Alone in the chapel of hope on Christmas Eve Reverend Bernice hates Christmas,since her mother was carried off by Papa Lazarou disguised as Santa Claus when she was a child. She has three visitors. The first is Charlie Hull,convinced from his recurring nightmare that his wife Stella is using a voodoo coven called the Solutions to stop him winning the line-dance contest. Then an old man who visited Herr Lipp and his wife in 1975 recounts the saga of Lipp's fascination with cute young choirboy Matthew and his belief that Lipp was a vampire. Finally Chinnery comes to unburden himself as to why he is such a bad vet. In Victorian times his great-great-grandfather,the finest vet in England,came to Royston Vasey but was tricked into touching the wrong monkey's testicle,as a result of which all succeeding vets in the family have been cursed. Bernice feels happier after consoling Chinnery but she is unaware that history is about to repeat itself.